Day 23 - Suppressed Fear to speak about 'cancer'

Desteni I Process

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid to speak out the word 'cancer'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear cancer withourt even investigating what this actually is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by fears based on little knowledge and hearsay about how and when and why one can get cancer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the existance of cancer for my life and suppress all feelings related to it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not talk about or write about my fear and instead pretended that I do not fear it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not only to fear the illness, but the word 'cancer' itself as well as the german equivalent 'Krebs'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to investigate and see all the amazing studies and insights into this widespread disease and it's causes and instead pretend to myself that I knew what all this is about.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit and diminish myself, my own insights because of fear and suppression.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate to be self honest with myself concerning my fear of the word cancer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make up all kinds of ideas and justifications for why I wouldn't speak about cancer and to establish the belief that through talking about it I could manifest it instead of realizing that my fear and suppression is much more likely fulfilling that part.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to realize that one starting point of me doing sports and physical exercise was fear and therefore that suppressed and ignored fear was damaging my effort and slowly undermining my self application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to go further at this point of fear of getting cancer to free myself from all my fears, unconditionally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit and harm myself and my body due to my cowardness and self dishonesty regarding my fear of cancer.

I commit myself to realize and debunk all thought concepts of procrastination, fear and dishonesty within myself because I see that the consequences of my Ignorance are harmfull to life, not mine alone but to all Life.

I commit myself to stand the self investigation of all my fears in order to free myself as life, to become a self directed, self honest and trustworthy supporter of all Life and what is best for all.

I commit myself to share my process of deconstructing inner concepts and conditionings in order to be a support for all those that commit themselves to Life, to self honesty and a world that is best for all.

I commit myself to break the circle of self-delusion about the protection of my ego and it's self interests that are all just bthought constructs and determining my Life and my actions not in the interest of Life itself, but in the interest of an illusionary entity.

I commit myself to expose the capitalistic system and all subsystems like the health systems and the pharmaceutical industry as what they are, a profit oriented machinery that has never and will never serve the interest of Life or the people's health, but the self interests of those that make the decisions. They use marketing strategies to spread fear and uncertainty among the people and lure them into beliefs and ideas about health and wellness, about dangers and cures that are never really founded in honesty and trustworthy research, but only in the profit oriented interests and greed of their managers.

Whenever I encounter a point of suppression and fear within myself I will stop my self righteous justifications and breathe, look at the fear and find the root causes, apply self forgiveness and self correction. Through this I will be able to realize myself as Life, one and equal to all Life and determine myself and my actions according to the principles of Life, of what is best for all Life.

This is the only way and an obviously necessairy thing to be done by each individual in an individual process, to free humanity, to free all Life from the enslavement through the mind. All the unnecessairy suffering of Life, the wars, crimes, rape, murder, all those things could be prevented through self honest self determination as Life, using the human potential like awareness, reason, intellect and common sense to put an end to all abuse. Stopping the mind from controlling your life, stopping the Ego once and for all.

This is the only human deed that shows true dignity.